Most Popular and Funny New Year’s Resolutions

by bintangkecil on Thursday, December 4th, 2008 | Humour, Inspiration, Life

New Year Resolution list by Amazon

A New Year’s Resolution is a commitment that an individual makes to a project or the reforming of a habit, often a lifestyle change that is generally interpreted as advantageous. (definition from wikipedia)

The name comes from the fact that these commitments normally go into effect on New Year’s Day and remain until fulfilled or abandoned.

More socio-centric examples include resolutions to donate to the poor more often, to become more assertive, or to become more economically or environmentally responsible. People may act similarly during the Christian fasting period of Lent, though the motive behind this holiday is more of sacrifice than of responsibility. The new year resolution is one example of the rolling forecast-method of planning. According to this method, plans are established at regular short or medium-term time intervals, when only a rough long-term plan exists.

There are religious parallels to this secular tradition. For example, in Judaism’s holiest holiday, Yom Kippur, one is to reflect upon one’s wrongdoings over the year and both seek and offer forgiveness. The concept, regardless of creed, is to reflect upon self-improvement annually.

Most Popular Goals:

1. Lose Weight
2. Pay Off Debt/s
3. Save Money
4. Get a Better Job
5. Get Fit
6. Eat Right
7. Get a Better Education
8. Drink less Alcohol
9. Quit Smoking
10. Reduce Stress Overall
11. Reduce Stress at Work
12. Take a Trip
13. Volunteer to Help Others

Here are some funny New Year’s resolutions:

* I will no longer waste my time relieving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future.

* I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.

* I will do less laundry and use more deodorant.

* I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve more water.

* Assure my lawyer that I will never again show up drunk at a custody hearing.

* I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly….

* I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses.

* I will stop sending e-mails to my wife (husband).

* I resolve to work with neglected children — my own.

* I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.

* I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I’m not a clock watcher.

* I will read the manual… just as soon as I can find it.

* I will think of a password other than “password.”

* I will not tell the same story at every get together.

* I won’t worry so much.

* I will cut my hair.

* I will grow my hair.

* I will stop considering other people’s feelings when they so obviously don’t consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I’ll tell him he stinks!

* I will be more imaginative.

* I will not hang around girls - they think you love them and that sucks.

* I will not ring the stewardess button on airplanes just to get her phone number.

Source: http://www.newyearfestival.com/funny-new-year-resolutions.html

Share/Save/Bookmark submit to reddit Add to Technorati Favorites

Tags: , , , , ,

10 Responses to “Most Popular and Funny New Year’s Resolutions”

  1. Owen
    1
    Owen Says:

    *grin* .. I think I will try and grow my hair this year too ;)

  2. Scott
    2
    Scott Says:

    Great post I know I have said several of them at the end of each year and normally I manage to get one accomplished. Thanks again for the laugh.

  3. Mark
    3
    Mark Says:

    I love this! I made a resolution last year not to make any more resolutions that I can’t keep. So thats me finished LOL!

  4. corrin
    4
    corrin Says:

    When I was in college my NYR was to make out more. I succeeded. :-P

  5. Julie
    5
    Julie Says:

    HA! Great list, this is hilarious! This might seem strange, but I have never made any new years resolutions.

  6. daria369
    6
    daria369 Says:

    Do less laundry and use more deodorant??
    I’m glad that person doesn’t live in my house…LOL

  7. bintangkecil
    7
    bintangkecil Says:

    Mark, hahaha .. that one’s pretty funny. I should put yours on the list? LOL!

  8. Sadie
    8
    Sadie Says:

    Avoid a bath whenever possible to conserve water?? Please! Use the water!! :p

  9. Christina thecoffeelady
    9
    Christina thecoffeelady Says:

    LMAO…. I resolute not to resolute! It never happens anyway…. I think my son is a water conservationist though!

  10. Connie
    10
    Connie Says:

    Good to laugh at NYR. I hate them because I just set myself up for failure. Better to laugh at other people’s.

Leave a Reply

Your Ad Here

Advertising Opportunities | Entries RSS | Comments RSS | Terms of Use | Top | Sidebar

Copyright © 2010 Blogoncherry